What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Randomize
