But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
