Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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