At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Randomize
