we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
