Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
