Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
