is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
