I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
do herpes really smell.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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