"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
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