'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
