just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Randomize
