So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
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