Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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