i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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