areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
