Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Randomize
