I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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