she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
