turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Randomize