on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize