Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Randomize
