if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
