Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Randomize
