dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Randomize
