I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
