Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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