The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
the liver wants what the liver wants
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
