At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Randomize