i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
