You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize