I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Randomize