I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
