are you still at the devil's house?
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Your cock deserves a montage
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
We had sex on a dog bed..
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
