Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
