we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
