i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
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