you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Randomize
