To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
