you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize
