YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
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