One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
