Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
