I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Randomize
