based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
