READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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