I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Please don't give away my fajitas
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