This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
