They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize