I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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