I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Randomize